i’d like to think it’s because of some honorable reason or even romantic reason like i’m thinking too much about DT but really i can’t sleep cause i slept from 6pm yesterday till 9am this morning… must be my record.
i had finals for one whole week so i almost didn’t sleep every night… i’d sleep an hour, wake up in sweat and panic attacks to the point i was frozen and couldn’t move… so when it was all over on thursday, i just crashed.
if i don’t ace my major courses, i should just die.
i never had panic attacks before so i didn’t know it when it was happening.. i only realized when it got to a point i had to scream at myself this is not normal stress… look, i’m stressed i’m stressed i’m stressed omg omg help me help me help me this moment this moment this moment omg omg what is this what is this what is this omg omg omg i’m super stressed i can’t take this moment right here this moment right here i can’t take it omg help me i can’t breathe i can’t breathe hooooooo haaaaaahh hoooooooooo haaaaaahh!!!
lol it was like that. it was short but many? keeps happening through the week. the hardest exam was on thursday so wednesday i suffered the most studying. i had to beat myself up to not sleep. i had to push and try soooo hard.. and discipline myself to a point i really feel like crying and dying, to study. so i slept 2 hours, even though i had a super hard day and i couldn’t take no more, i slept 2 hours and continued and keep continuing for 4 days… i almost compared myself to Jesus and His death for three days and how He battled death for 3 days before He resurrected. oh this must be what He felt like, i thought. lol.. funny how His birthday is next on the calendar.
